Help
by Pippin Turner
Summary: But above everything, he feared death. Death without redemption. Without acception. But he would never be accepted. He was a pirate, one of the filthier beings of this age. RR please. Rated R for later chapters and subject material. possible slash.


Hey ho(es) mwehehe! this is actually chapters 1-5 of this ficlet, it's not complete yet, but will be eventually, I promise. -. Please review, feel free to add any ideas or things you'd like to see in the future.   
  
Will was gone. Dead.  
  
There was no day for him, no night, there was only time. Time and his thoughts. Horrible, murderous, vengeful thoughts.  
  
They dragged him from one jailer to another, threatening, persuading, and bullying him into speaking of the young boys' death. He just sat, his eyes focused on the floor, or he lay on his stomach with his face buried in his arms. He simply lay or sat, say nothing and unnoticing. His food was brought and left an hour later, untouched. He drank no water, no draught, he just sat, lost in his own world.  
  
He did not struggle when they led him by the wrists to new jails, he just followed with sullen, dragging feet. He looked on without hope, his eyes like pools of ink, lying upon his cold face. He turned away from his former life and looked upon the dark waters where he was created. They're dark facades, laughing at him, taunting him, tempting him. Tempting him to take the blame for the young whelps' murder, just so he could feel free. Free from this emotional prison of depression and guilt...  
  
Jack knew he could never change himself and mix with the proper men and women of this day and age. Jack feared society, it's cold hand rejecting him upon the jagged rocks of alienation. But above everything, he feared death. Death without redemption. Without acception. But he would never be accepted. He was a pirate, one of the filthier beings of this age. Pirates were the maggots of society, they were despised above everything else unnatural.  
  
But maybe he would never be accepted into the arms of society. Maybe this was all he had. This jail cell and the insipid feelings that were churning inside of him. Fighting to break free of their fleshy confines. Or maybe all he had was his dream. His dream of nothingness. It was like falling forever through a moonlit sky.  
  
He stood, moving to the small barred window. The smell of urine and mold making they're way from his nostrils. He breathed deep, smelling the bakery across the road. He grasped the bars with his shackled hands, what he wouldn't give to be free again. Sound reached his ears, people outside of his window staring up at him. They were chanting for his death. He closed his eyes, trying to force them away and opened them, finding them still there. He turned away and sat on the hard mattress. He closed his eyes, going back into his own world. His dream.  
  
He could make out voices, 'Jack...Jack, can you hear me?' There was a long pause, 'Jack you've got a visitor, a Miss Turner.' Jack's eyes sprang open as he jumped to his feet.  
  
"Did you say Miss Turner?" He grasped the cold bars in his hands.  
  
"Aye. What would you like me to do with her?" The jailer responded.  
  
"P-Please send her in."  
  
It had been a long while since he had seen Miss Elizabeth. He hadn't seen her since young William disappeared.  
  
"Hello Jack." She said, stepping inside the small cell.  
  
"Hello Elizabeth." Jack, softened the mattress out, "Please, have a seat."  
  
She looked questionably at the soiled mattress.  
  
"I'm sorry, love, but it's the best I can do."  
  
She smiled and sat next to him, "Jack, I came here to talk to you about something very important."  
  
"You've come to talk about your dear William, I presume?"  
  
"Well no, and yes." She removed her gloves and placed them in her lap, "I came to talk to you about," She lowered her voice, "getting you out of here. I know you didn't do it. You cared for Will almost more than I did." Elizabeth fiddled with her gloves nervously, "I just can't bare to see a man wrongly imprisoned."  
  
"Why do you want to help me so badly?" He eyed her, "What's in it for you?"  
  
"Why do you do that?" She raised her voice.  
  
"Do what Miss Turner?"  
  
"Turn everything around so it has more than one meaning! All I want to do is help you out of here and you're acting like I want something out of it!"  
  
His eyes fell to the floor, "I'm sorry, but heh, when you're a pirate for as long as I've been, you have to think like that." He looked back into her eyes. "I meant no offense."  
  
"It's alright." She leaned closer, "I've got Smithy and the rest of the crew coming by later to help you break out of here." She made sure she had his full attention, "They're bringing the Black Pearl."  
  
Jack's eyes lit up, even seemed to glow, "The Pearl."  
  
"Be ready, for if I can not get Commodore Norrington to set bail for you, the Pearl will come for you." She paused, "If I can bail you from here, I will return before the sun sets." She rose and called the jailer to let her leave.  
  
"Elizabeth, wait."  
  
She turned to face him, "Yes Jack?"  
  
"Thank you."  
  
Jack woke in the wee hours of the morning. He stood, hearing a rumbling in the distance. He bounded over to the window and smiled to himself  
  
"The Pearl."  
  
It was only a matter of time before he could be free again. He watched the Pearl battle the fleet, coming out victoriously as usual. Jack would have it no other way. He turned, facing the corridor to his cell.  
  
"Jack?" A low voice came.  
  
"Smithy! I'm here!" He waved his hands. "Alright, now, I've been bailed from this cell before. All you've got to do is take that top from the table there."  
  
Smithy picked it up, "Aye?"  
  
"Good, now put it against the bars and pull down at the same time I push up."  
  
"Alright Jack."  
  
"Ready? Pull."  
  
The door popped up and off of its hinges.  
  
Jack stepped from his cell, "Thank ye', mate." He looked around, "My effects?"  
  
Smithy reached over to the rack, "Here." He handed Jack his hat and sword.  
  
"My gun?"  
  
Elizabeth stepped forward, "Captain."  
  
Jack smiled at her, "Thank you love." He strapped his holster on, "Where to?"  
  
"This way." Elizabeth led them outside of the jail.  
  
"The crew will be back at the ship by now." Smithy said to Jack.  
  
"Good, then we can make our exit." He turned to Elizabeth, "Is there any way we can go unseen?"  
  
"Sure there is." She made a few lefts and a right, stopping abruptly before the dock. "The Pearl awaits your return gentlemen."  
  
"Don't tell me ye ain't coming?"  
  
"I only come on invitation Smithy. No matter how long I've been around pirates, I'll always be a proper lady."  
  
"Proper ladies don't wear pants my dear." Jack said with a toothy smile, "Consider yourself invited. Now, can we please go before we are gotten?"  
  
Jack went first, followed by Elizabeth and then Smithy. He stopped at the end of the dock.  
  
"It looks like we will be taking a moonlight swim tonight." He turned to face them and with a wink, "Tally ho." He dove into the water, making his way to the Pearl.  
  
Elizabeth dove in, followed by Smithy.  
  
"I don't think," He coughed up some sea water, "I've ever swam this far in my life." He finished.  
  
"Well, hang around old Jack more and you'll do things you never thought you would have." Jack grabbed a hold of one of the ropes hanging from the Pearl. He grabbed Elizabeth, "Ladies first."  
  
Smithy was the last to come up the ropes, "This is the last time I'm rescuing you." He rang out his braided hair, then emptying his shoes.   
  
"Finally deciding to follow the code?" Jack smirked at him, "gentlemen," He rose his voice, "Bring her around!" He turned, making his way to his quarters.  
  
"Where are we going Smithy?" Elizabeth almost whispered.  
  
"If I know Jack, and I do, we're headed straight for Tortuga."  
  
Elizabeth smiled and went down to Jack's quarters to find him face down on the mattress, "Jack?"  
  
He spoke into the blankets, "I love this bed," He rolled over, "and this pillow and that window..." He sat up noticing Elizabeth, "What can I do for 'ye love?"  
  
"Is it true, that you meant o head for Tortuga?" her brows furrowed in a mixture of fear and child-like excitement.  
  
He grinned, ear to ear, "I always mean what I do and in this case what I'm meaning to do is return to the 'homeland' as one might call it." He drabbled on, "I know those streets like the back of my palm...what a proliferous bouquet Tortuga is..."  
  
"Tortuga then?" She raised an eyebrow, moving closer to where he was sitting.  
  
"Aye, what of it?" he took off his hat and scratched his head.  
  
"Nothing, I'm just...I don't know."  
  
"You're just what?" he paused waiting for her response, "Come now love, you can tell ole' Jack what's on your wee little mind."  
  
"Frightened." She sat opposite him, facing the small porthole.  
  
He turned and placed a comforting hand on her shoulders, "Nonsense, there's nothing to be afraid of when ole' Jack is in town. As long as you're with me, nothing bad can happen. The closer to mischief you are, the farther from danger you'll be."  
  
"I'm not sure that makes any sense, but since you are the captain..." She fiddled with a tie from her pants, "Jack, I have a question."  
  
"Aye Miss Turner?"  
  
"Where am I going to be sleeping tonight?"  
  
He sighed and shrugged, "I guess anywhere you like."  
  
Jack silently cursed himself later that night as he lay on the floor in his own quarters, "Bloody rubbish I've gotten myself into." he sat up and looked to the sleeping figure of Elizabeth in his bed and mocked her, "Where am I going to be sleeping tonight?" He huffed, "Bloody hell." He tipped his hat over his eyes and lay back, drifting off into a dream.  
  
The next morning Jack awoke with a start, "Will..." He touched his face, "It was just a dream..." He whispered to himself. He looked to Elizabeth, "How long have you been watching me?"  
  
"Too long." She sat up, "You we're having a bad dream."  
  
"Yes, I haven't forgotten." He got up and sat on the bed, falling into the soft blankets.  
  
"What did you dream about?"  
  
He took a long breath, "Will." He closed his eyes as they began to burn, "It's not very often that I don't." He looked to her, "I couldn't save him Elizabeth. I couldn't stop them from taking him. I just couldn't do it..." His eyes began to tear.  
  
Elizabeth leaned over and hugged Jack, "I know, but it's important that you tried." She ran her hand through his hair, "It's okay Jack."  
  
He hugged her back and regained his composure, "Don't tell the crew about my blubbering."  
  
She laughed, "Not a word."  
  
"Thank you." He rested his elbows on his knees, "You know, out of all the people I've ever known, you are the kindest one. And you've helped me the most."  
  
She smiled an all knowing smile, "It's hard not to be nice to you Jack. You seem like someone who could use a little help now and then."  
  
"I'm not sure whether to take that as a compliment or toss you off of my bed. I'll ignore the latter." He rose and stretched heading out to greet the crew.  
  
Smithy was outside, "Morning Jack!" he looked to the horizon, "We're almost there."  
  
Jack grinned, "I know, I can feel it. [in his pants ;D lol]"  
  
"Morning gentlemen." Elizabeth chimed.  
  
"Wind in your sails! Wind in your sails!"   
  
Jack looked up, "Blast that parrot." He looked back to Elizabeth, "Good morning Miss Elizabeth."  
  
"Morning Elizabeth." Smithy said.  
  
"How much longer until we reach port?"  
  
"Less than half a days journey left." Jack answered.  
  
The Black Pearl docked in the harbor of Tortuga later that evening. Jack headed out, showing Elizabeth around before it got too dark to safely navigate the alleyways of Tortuga.  
  
"And this here," He stopped in front of a dilapidated storefront, "is my favorite place in the whole of Tortuga."   
  
Elizabeth looked up, reading the sign, "The Harbor Meister? What is this place?"  
  
"What else would me favorite place be?" He swung the door open, the smell of smoke and alcohol pouring out into the fading daylight. "A tavern one might call it, or not… I guess it all depends on what leg you like to put in your pants first…" He drabbled on as he found them a place to sit.   
  
They sat by a dirty window and Elizabeth reached over with the sleeve of her coat, wiping a tiny portion clean. She gazed out of the window as Jack began to speak to her.  
  
"What'll it be love, rum or rum?"  
  
She smiled, "Do I have a choice?"  
  
"Not at all." He shook his head and flashed her a golden smile.  
  
"Rum it is." She gazed back out of the window and drifted from time and space into a forgotten place.  
  
Night came quicker than anyone could have hoped for, playing with the light, making the shadows dance across Jack's bronze skin. Elizabeth couldn't help herself, she wasn't sure if it was the rum or some fleeting feeling inside of her, but she was almost certain for a moment that she was in love with Jack. The feeling left a sure as it came as her eyes began to get heavy.   
  
"'Beth?" Came a low, raspy, rumble from across the table. "Beth ye' a'right?" A voice that could only be Jack's.   
  
Gibbs looked to her and smiled, "I think she's imbibed perhaps more than she can take for the night."  
  
Jack frowned, his whiskers swooping down, as he got up. He knelt beside her, "Beth? Beth, can ye' 'ear me lass?" Upon getting no response he scooped her up, "I'll be bringing 'er up Gibbs. We make way at sunrise."   
  
Jack nodded, walking towards the stairs, using his best judgement for his placement of foot on the stairs. "Come on now 'Beth, ole' Jacky is 'avin trouble getting' ye' up these bloody rickety stairs. No doubt, made by Eunuchs." He smiled to himself as they came upon the door. Jack reached down, jiggling the door knob open.  
  
Once inside he set her on the bed and closed the door. Jack brushed the hair from her face, watching the light from the moon play like waves across her delicate features. "Ole' Jack made a promise to dear William, a promise he intends to keep."  
  
Jack leaned over the boy, his chest heaving, blood seeping from his mouth. He bit back tears at the sight of his dear, strong William lying in the heat of blood shed.   
  
A tear seeped down Will's face as he choked on the words he spoke, "I'm not afraid Jack, just promise me." He closed his eyes, swallowing hard.  
  
Jack's response came quick, "Anything…"  
  
"Look after Beth when I'm-" He coughed, fighting the urge to heave, "when I'm gone."  
  
"I won't be 'avin to keep that promise. You'll be fine, you just keep your eyes," He wiped an angry tear away, "on ole' Jack."  
  
Will began to close his eyes, his breathing slowing.  
  
"NO, Will! You listen to my voice." He shook the boy, forcing him to open his eyes.  
  
Will began to shake, "It doesn't hurt anymore, Jack." Referring to his wounds, "I'm c-cold."  
  
Jack let the tears fall freely, for he knew the oncoming signs of death. He took off his jacket, placing it around the boy, "Will, I-" His chest stopped moving, "WILL! Oh, no, no, Will…" He brought the boy up into his arms, rocking back and fourth, his sobs wracking his body, "I love you boy." His accent disappeared, the swagger returning just as fast as it had gone.  
  
Jack sat, even now fighting back the tears stinging his eyes. Elizabeth stirred at the sound of his sobs. Sobs that disappeared into the night, fading in loud conversations just outside of the window.  
  
"Jack?" She rolled over and sat up to face him.  
  
Jack turned away, "What 'Beth?" He wiped at his face, his voice showing no sign of his per usual swagger or accent.  
  
She reached over, wrapping her arms around him, resting her chin on his shoulder, "It's alright Jack. Whatever it is your thinking about, it's alright."  
  
Jack began to sob openly, more memories flooding back to him.   
  
"What is it Jack?" She paused, "Are you thinking about Will?"  
  
Jack turned to face her, "What else would I be crying about?"  
  
Elizabeth's brows furrowed, "Your accent…it's gone…"  
  
Jack smiled, "I know, love."  
  
She frowned, thinking, as much as one in her condition could possibly do, "Why's it gone?"   
  
"Long story, love, go back to sleep." He ran a hand through her hair, "No sense in me telling you if you are just going to forget come morning."   
  
"I won't forget Jack." She pouted, Jack pushing her back to lay on the bed.  
  
"Yes," He paused, "Yes you will." He swallowed hard over the growing lump in his throat, "Now go to sleep Elizabeth."  
  
She huffed, not used to the sudden feeling of not getting her way, "Fine."   
  
Jack lay next to her, on his side so he could watch her, "Elizabeth?" He asked as she began to drift off, "Beth?"  
  
Elizabeth snapped awake, eyes quickly traveling to Jack's own kohl rimmed depths, "Yes Jack?"  
  
He moved, one, delicate, outstretched finger, tucking hair behind a pale ear, "I love you lass." He smiled, placing a kiss atop her head.   
  
She had drifted off before Jack's answer came, dreaming of past adventures on the high sea.  
  
Jack watched her until the sun peered into the window, blinding him and causing him to get up and close the dark, musty curtains. He crawled back into the bed, running a hand across Elizabeth's cheek to wake her up, " 'Beth?"   
  
Elizabeth stirred, eyes fluttering open and senses reeling as she acknowledged the feather light touch of Jack's palm on her cheek. She smiled, hiding a small fluster and reached up, placing her hand over Jack's' contrastingly tanned one.  
  
Jack's breath caught in his throat, heartbeat accelerating. Jack usually wasn't the one caught in a bundle of nerves, usually he was the one making every, carefully, expertly planned move. But somehow, now, the tables were turned and Jack found himself, unusually, speechless.  
  
Jack returned the smile, exposing a few mismatched golden teeth, "We best be off love, we got a ship to sail and things to do."  
  
Elizabeth sighed, pulling his hand back to her, "Jack…" He sat up, allowing his hand to be of service, "I heard what you said last night."  
  
Jack frowned, trying to cover it up, "Heard wha'? I didn't say anything…"  
  
Elizabeth rolled her eyes, "Yes you did." She paused, fiddling with a string from the blanket covering her, "You said that…you said you loved me."  
  
Jack tried to play it off like he forgot, "OH! That!" He frowned, seeing she wasn't amused, "What about it?" His accent once again disappeared, fading with his smirk.  
  
"Did…" She began to stutter, nerves overcoming her otherwise stable demeanor, "Did you mean it?"  
  
Jack swallowed hard, looking down to his lap and recoiled his hand, placing it in his gaze, "I did, yes."  
  
Elizabeth smiled and began to speak but was cut off by Jack.  
  
"But, no matter. It would never work." He frowned, the urge for his eyes to tear growing stronger with the thought.  
  
"And, why not?"  
  
Jack smiled, it quickly disappearing into the frown, and looked back up to her, "My heart belongs to another…person."  
  
Elizabeth pouted, lifting her eyes to his, "Will."  
  
"No, love." He smiled at the thought, "Not dear William. Although he was as dear to me as a bonnie lass, we were naught to be lovers."  
  
Her brows crossed, pausing in thought, "Who, then?"  
  
Jack laughed to himself, "Ye'll never guess."  
  
"That's why I'm asking you Jack." She smirked.  
  
Jack laughed, placing a hand on his chest, "No one but ole' Jamie Norrington."  
  
Elizabeth's eyes nearly fell out of her head, "You mean James, James Norrington? The same Commodore that tried to kill you not so long ago?"  
  
Jack smirked, "No, the other Commodore." He laughed, "There's a lot of things ole' Jamie failed to tell ye'."  
  
Elizabeth frowned, "Jack, why do you talk like that anyways?"  
  
"I have to." He frowned.  
  
"But, Jack. If you and James are…you and James, why are we running in the first place?"  
  
Jack smirked, "You'll have your bloody father, Weatherby, to thank for that. Ole' Weatherby found out a bit more than he bargained for, put Jamie on leave and ordered any officer that sees me to fire on the spot. I shouldn't have left jail, I was safe there. No doubt the Royal Navy is scouring the waves for me."  
  
Elizabeth frowned, "Well, I suppose we'd better be off."  
  
Jack smirked, "Back to me only Bonnie Lass."  
  
Once aboard the Pearl Jack disappeared into his cabin, leaving Gibbs in Command. He silently reprimanded himself for not sleeping last night and fell into the calling blankets of his bed. Tossing and turning to find the right spot, he buried his face into the silken pillowcase. Jack inhaled deeply, smelling the comforting smell of seawater, pipe tobacco and class. The smell of James. He smiled to himself, deciding perhaps that would be the best spot to sleep in.   
  
Jack kicked his boots off, pulling the blankets around him, still inhaling the scent of James when it was needed. Just as he began to flutter off to sleep he was pulled from the blissful makings of a dream by a knock sounding on his cabin door.  
  
Jack grunted and got up, stockinged feet padding across the bare floor. His eyes were shut and opened quickly when he smelled seawater, pipe tobacco and class. "Jamie love!" He slung an arm around James and then pulled back upon getting no response from the other. "Jamie, ye' look like ye've seen a ghost." He pulled the other, taller, ashen man into his cabin, seating him on the bed next to himself.  
  
James looked up, his usually sparkling green eyes now gray and stormy, "Jack," A bead of water dripped from his nose onto the blankets, causing Jack to stare at it, "they're coming for you." His shoulders shook, energy drained from his body.  
  
Jack's brows furrowed, "Who's coming Jamie?" He pushed James back on the bed, running a comforting tanned hand through short, black hair. "What's gotten you into such a mess?"  
  
James took a deep breath, his lip quivering, "They fought me, their own Commodore." His eyes closed until his eyelids turned yellow and hurt, "They found out Jack." His eyes flickered open; "They know my secret."  
  
Jack frowned, "Jamie, they already know about us."  
  
"No, Jack. They know about me, about what I've done." His hand traveled downwards to his collared wrist, playing with the scar underneath. "Sometimes I just want to burn it off…"  
  
Jack reached down, taking the wrist in question into his own hands. He opened the cuff, bringing the all too familiar 'P' brand to his lips and kissed it tenderly. "There's no use in doin tha' Jamie love."  
  
James smiled his eyes threatening to close and every ounce of color disappearing from his face.  
  
Jack looked to James' face, "Jamie, wha's the matter?" He reached up, cupping an elegantly etched jaw line in his palms.  
  
James frowned, coughing a bit, "Nothing Jack." His hands traveled underneath his jacket and waistcoat, "Nothing."  
  
Jack frowned, pulling James' hands from underneath his clothing. He gasped, "Jamie love, tha's not nothing." He stared at the crimson stain corrupting James' beautifully pale skin.  
  
James unbuttoned his jacket and waistcoat, his loosely buttoned shirt fully soaked in early morning massacre, "It's nothing as long as you're around."  
  
Jack undid James' shirt, looking at the angry wound slashed across his lover's torso. "Jamie…"  
  
"It's okay Jack, it's alright." His eyes closed, smile playing across his lips, "I've accomplished what I came for. There's no need for me to be afraid."  
  
Jack's brows furrowed, "No, Jamie." Almost whimpering he went to a cabinet that was built into the wall, spilling all sorts of bottles and boxes onto the bed. He ran to the Cabin door and half stood outside, "GIBBS!" Gibbs huffed over, "Get Miss Elizabeth, tell her it's an emergency."  
  
Gibbs could see the threatening tears in Jack's eyes and peered over Jack's shoulder into the cabin, seeing James lying on the bed, "Of course." He nodded, running off to get Elizabeth.  
  
Elizabeth opened the door as soon as the knock came to see Gibbs in a rather heightened state of panic. "What's the matter?"  
  
"Commodore has come aboard, not long ago. He's in the Cap'n's cabin. Cap'n's requesting your presence rather immediately." He turned on his heels, headed for Jack's cabin, "He's hurt I reckon."  
  
Elizabeth hurried into the cabin, shutting the door behind her and gasped at the sight. Jack was tossing things in all directions and James, propped on a pillow, was yelling for Jack to calm down. She hurried to the bedside, taking in the extent of James' injury. "Commodore…" Words escaped her as a book flew from one side of the room to the other. "Jack!" She stood grasping Jack's wrists in hers, "Stop it!"  
  
Jack looked like a frightened schoolboy, "I'm…" A tear stained his cheek and he pointed to James, "Help!"  
  
Elizabeth let go of Jack returning to James' side. "Jack, I'm going to need a bottle of rum, needle, thread, and your sleeves."  
  
"Rum?" He paused, "My sleeves?!"  
  
"Don't ask Jack, just do it!" Elizabeth looked into James' eyes, "James, in a minute you're going to feel quite like a rag doll."  
  
James smiled, "Why's that?"   
  
"Because I'm going to sew you up…" She took the things from Jack, pouring rum on the wound to clean it of any infections. Next she heated the needle in the lantern to clean it off and then threaded it, beginning to patch the skin on James' body together. "Stop. Moving." After she finished she wrapped Jack's sleeves around the wound, "Commodore, don't move around too much. Otherwise you'll break the stitching."  
  
"Please, Elizabeth, call me James." His eyes began to shut in a mixture of pain, lack of energy and contentment to be at Jack's side.  
  
Jack sprung to his feet, enveloping Elizabeth in a hug, "Thank you so much love." He pulled away to look her in the eyes, "Do ye' think he'll be alright?"  
  
"I'm not a doctor Jack, I did the best I could. Just keep an eye on him." She pulled from him, jealousy surging through her veins. James had something she wanted and she couldn't stand it.   
  
Jack frowned, "Thank ye' lass." He let go of her, returning to James' side, placing his head lightly on his chest.  
  
Elizabeth turned on her heels, leaving, jealousy consuming her will to stay.  
  
Don't forget to review ;p. -Haley 


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